Greetings All –
YOU THINK YOUR PERSONAL PROBLEMS ARE COMPLEX. You think
the world’s problems are complex. You think your future and your destiny are
complex. This is because you have lived in imagination and have attempted to
resolve questions without certainty. This is the result of using your personal
beliefs to organize the universe according to your liking. This is the result
of attempting the impossible, and this is the result of failing the impossible.
YOU HAVE BEEN SAVED BECAUSE KNOWLEDGE is with you. You
have been redeemed because you are learning to receive Knowledge. Thus it is
that all conflicts will become resolved, and you will find true purpose,
meaning and direction in the world. You will find that you will still attempt
to solve your problems for yourself, and this will only remind you that you
need Knowledge to guide you, for all your own efforts can do without Knowledge
is remind you of your need for Knowledge.
THEREFORE,TODAY REMEMBER UPON THE HOUR that
Knowledge is with you and that you are a student of Knowledge. Have confidence that
all problems you perceive—great and small, within yourself and without—will be
resolved through Knowledge. Remind yourself as well that this does not put you
in a passive state. This will require your active engagement as a student of
Knowledge and the active development of your abilities for a true purpose.
Indeed, you have been passive before because of your attempts at the impossible
and your failure at the impossible. Now you are becoming active, and that which
is active within you is Knowledge, for you are now receiving your True Self.
IN YOUR TWO LONGER PRACTICES, actively engage
yourself with today’s idea. Attempt to penetrate its meaning. Review all ideas
and beliefs that you currently possess that are related to it. Allow yourself
to take inventory of your thoughts and beliefs so that you may come to recognize
the work that must be accomplished within you. You are the first recipient of
Knowledge, and once you have attained a certain degree of accomplishment here,
Knowledge will naturally flow through you. Your activities will then be
increasingly engaged in serving the world around you, and greater problems will
be presented to you so that you may be saved from your own dilemma.
PRACTICE 313: Two 30-minute practice periods. Hourly
practice.
This Step requires personal inventory. The journal
is a place to record this.
6:02
a.m. Wednesday – May 24, 200 – Still in Roanoke – Where am I? Wrong planet? The
time in my life when I had meaning, purpose, direction – 1980 – me and the Kids.
I'm mystified – <review of obits show this as a very difficult time.>
--- Community – where is mine?
Step
312 – There are greater problems for me to solve in the world.
→ The text says,
"Many of your personal problems will be resolved as you give yourself to a
greater calling. (being a student of Knowledge)…will activate all meaningful
individual development and all meaningful individual education."
–
"…take heart that a greater involvement is promised which will provide you
escape from your individual misery."
→ I feel I've
been trying to solve a greater problem alone – and have failed – because there
is no community.
Newscast
(about Tom's life) "As far as we can tell, he acted alone."
→ Review – all of
your small personal problems.
--- Job
wise – I don't know a next step – haven't known for several years. I find I'm
not adequately prepared for retirement. My relationship with Cindy is neutral.
The house needs many little things.
On
the skill side – I need to learn more about people
– and Office 2000.
I
need to know if S2K is a cult. (It's not.)
My
sense is that the structure will change. We have a community of $ with empty
relationships.
7:07
a.m. Reading "Fast Company" an article about Michael Ray – a teacher
of creativity –
I
Know my work. The title has changed – but the work of regional community
remains. Local government is not the first promoter of regional community.
7:30
a.m. As I think of the issues/situation facing me – the relationship --- as
unresolved pain. ---
What
is constant in my life? My parents, my children, my vision of cooperation.
I
grew up in a community. It seemed too small – I didn't fit, but I was taught
and learned. I had little power –
9:18
a.m. In a session on Commuter Benefits – my mundane job – the details of making
our transportation system work.
Q:
If people work/live near their community & recreation – where should I
live?
>
Watching the world – I feel that I'll disappear –
We
can only achieve wholeness through community/family
→ Transportation
Challenge – making the land use work when it was not set with transportation in
mind.
→ In the past –
urban growth/settlement was determined by transportation.
11:34
a.m. Practice #2 Step 312
text
"Many of your personal problems will be resolved as you give yourself to a
greater calling." – On reading this tonight – my reaction was "I
thought I'd already given myself to a greater calling. A spiritual
search." But, reading it again now – the truth is I've not found a
specific calling nor a teacher. S2K may be both.
It
says I couldn't establish priorities – which is mostly true.
→ Actively review
all of your small personal problems. – Review all the things you think hold you
back. And all the things you think you must resolved for yourself.
–
What holds me back: (From? RI!)
–
Lack of clear client
–
Lack of money
–
Lack of energy when I have time
–
Poor food, exercise & sleep habits
–
wasting time
–
burnout with other people
–
lack of allies
–
lack of partners
1:55
PM. Practice 2.5 –
Must
resolved myself
–
retirement/fund void
–
ability to invest
–
relationship with wife
–
relationship at work
–
focus too varied – unfocused
–
needs of David & Sarah
–
where I live
–
what my community is
–
why I continue on
– my
own ambivalence
Lives differ, lists will differ. Self-knowledge can
be challenging. Let us continue.
NNC
P.S. At Step 313, we are less than two months from
the end – Step 365. If you’ve found this and find some appeal in this or other
Steps, you should really go to the beginning blog post. From here you learn about Steps to Knowledge and
can begin it on the day that makes sense and then progress as needed. You can
use the posts on this blog as a companion if it helps. They will remain in
order in the archives - one per Step.
Often it takes 18 months to get through the Steps
once. For this blog, the pace is one-a-day, but it really makes no difference
how fast you do it, only that you begin, persist and repeat. Posts here provide
a trail that may let you have a virtual companion when and if you want one. One
may have to study alone, as I did in the beginning. There are other Steps
students blogging their experience and you might find a person more like you as
a companion, or use a number of such Steps journeys. There are options as well
through the Free School of the New Message.
