Step 359 - I am present to serve the world. Entry for Step 358 - I wish to be at home in the world.

Greetings All –

BE PRESENT TO SERVE THE WORLD, and the presence that serves the world will speak through you. Be present to serve the world, and you will be present to that presence. You will be engaged in every activity, and every activity will be important and meaningful. Then, you will not seek escape from your experience, you will not seek escape from the world and you will not seek to find a dark place in which to hide, for you will realize the light of Knowledge is totally beneficent. You will wish to bathe in it more and more and express it more and more within the world. This is your duty here and your great love.

UPON THE HOUR REMIND YOURSELF that you wish to be present to serve the world. Remind yourself as well that you wish to be present to have the world serve you. Remind yourself that you must learn how to receive and how to give, and that is why you are a beginning student of Knowledge. Do not burden yourself with expectations of yourself beyond what is being indicated in your program of preparation. Your Teachers recognize your current stage and they recognize your current step. They do not underestimate your power, but they do not overestimate your current capabilities, either. That is why you will need them to proceed with certainty, honesty and reliability.

IN YOUR DEEPER PRACTICES, be present to give yourself to your practice in stillness. Remember again that all practice is giving. You are giving yourself so that your True Self may be given to you. Here you bring what is small to what is great and what is great brings itself to what is small. Here you realize that you too are great and that the small is meant to express the greatness of which you are a part. The world calls desperately for this greatness to be revealed, yet you must learn how to reveal greatness in the world.

PRACTICE 359: Two 30-minute practice periods. Hourly practice.

The journal for the day of this Step, July 9, 2000, concludes late in the day:

Practice #2 continues. The issue – "I was not at home in the world." – was not clear to me a year ago. It has been a long-term concern for sure, but to imagine at the start that that was to be healed – was impossible, improbable.

To be "at home" in the world – this my personal wall of separation.

How – simple? Not simple – it took a year to get here. I no longer have to fake it. I no longer have to be a fraud.

As written yesterday of Step 357, the closing sentence: “The world is the place where you have come to express your Self because the world is the place where you wish to be at home,” led to anAh-ha!” moment for me.

The Step 358 text also says: “You have brought your Ancient Home with you—within the seed and within the light of your Knowledge, which is now growing, emerging and sprouting forth.”

In the American Indian traditions, people had totem animals that were symbolic of characteristics they had or sought. When I studied Native American spirituality, the hawk and turtle became totems for me, the first representing vision from a higher place, and the second, moving at ground level with long term persistence.

This came out as this image drawn in the Steps book for Step 319. Though not dated, I think it is from the second Steps study and not the first. 

In these Steps, the existential problem of life is solved. To be honest, it has reappeared in the past 14 years, but through study, stillness, work and experience, it could not produce confusion and depression. Doubts can have long lives. In this regard, the turtle shell is useful.

Here is the journal in which I “seriously consider what home means” to me:

8:40 a.m. Sunday, July 9, 2000

Step 358 – "I wish to be at home in the world." Practice #1 – Home is a safe place, where you are not afraid. A way to be safe is to isolate. Others have claimed ownership of the world and set rules or act in ways that degrade the earth. I feel at home in the woods, I feel at home in meditation.

In the economic world, the built and economic environments, things change and people must adapt. Some change is growth, some decline, some elimination, some totally new.

Home is a place where you are accepted and understood, or if misunderstood – there is tolerance.

I have not felt at home in the world on many occasions. When a teen – I was depressed – and wanted to leave.

The world is a difficult place for humanity. They’ve worked out a few cultural systems, religions, political – and most say, theirs is the one.

From my earliest days I was interested in political science, history – the mechanisms for making the world better. It is no surprise that I'm in planning and public service.

I have been seeking to understand and give to the world all my life. The gap has been that I was dealing with the whole from a viewpoint that many didn't share. I would love to find 4 – 10 people with the related mindset.

Front Royal is where I live. Six-0-Seven Midland Avenue is my house. My Home town is Two Rivers, though I was born in Manitowoc. We would have gone back to Wisconsin after Navy/VA Tech – but M.E. didn't want a Master’s degree – she wanted a baby.

It turns out I liked the Navy because I had friends.

I have much to contribute to the world from the experiences I've had in planning and in life. The only way to do that is to publish. The web is an inexpensive way. I have the pieces. I need some partners.

Regardless of the plans Spirit has for me, these are outcomes from my mundane work which need to be shared.

Every locality needs a regional strategy for the global economy. Your greatest asset is your people. People, if educated, will do what it takes –---

For me to be at home in the world, it must offer a better home for others. Improving the governance system is a way to do that.

I've been fearful, even as I’ve pushed. People have not been using the Knowledge available. I am at home in the woods – but no longer could live there.

My work has contributed some to the world, but not all that I'm capable of doing.

All who use power have critics, many are condemned. Some should be. I do not want power, but promote powerful ideas.

10:58 a.m. I have an earthly family – why should it be hard to be at home in the world?

3:05 p.m. Home is where there is family – there is heart.
7:45 p.m. Practice #2 – start –

This has been a good day. Things are coming together. I can be at home in the world because I have a family where I belong and because I am the family to which I have children who belong. The world need not work perfectly. Relationships do not work perfectly. There is enough safe space in which to operate and enough room for new Knowledge to come forth in the evolution of the world.

A plan for me is emerging – I will continue to work with my resources – vis & in –

10:22 p.m. "Lost At Sea the Search for Longitude" – the movie on A & E an inspirational story.

Practice #2 continues. The issue – "I was not at home in the world." – was not clear to me a year ago. It has been a long-term concern for sure, but to imagine at the start that that was to be healed – was impossible, improbable.

To be "at home" in the world – this my personal wall of separation.

How – simple? Not simple – it took a year to get here. I no longer have to fake it. I no longer have to be a fraud.

Given the calendar and the January 1 start date, Step 358 fell on Christmas Eve and 359 is on Christmas Day, December 25. Possibly not the best for study, if you have high involvement in the many events of these Holy Days, but then again, sometimes these family days can be lonely, even when many are present. Earthly and Spiritual Families can be far apart.

If you’ve been with the Steps all this time, and been an engaged student, there is more distance to go. In the journal I’ve already begun looking ahead to the second time through, as I know I didn’t get it all the first time. Let us continue, planning to begin again January 1.

P.S. At Step 359, we are six Steps from the end – Step 365. This is not the place to begin this Practice. If you’ve some interest due to this or other Steps, you should go to the beginning blog post. From here you will learn about Steps to Knowledge and can begin it on the day that makes sense; then progress as needed. You can use the posts on this blog as a companion if it helps. They will remain in order in the archives - one post per Step.

Often it takes 18 months to get through the Steps once. For this blog, the pace is one-a-day, but it really makes no difference how fast you do it, only that you begin, persist and repeat. Posts here provide a trail that may let you have a virtual companion when and if you want one. One may have to study alone, as I did in the beginning. There are other Steps students blogging their experience and you might find a person more like you as a companion, or use a number of such Steps journeys. There are options as well through the Free School of the New Message