This is a spiritual practice. It has been given to Humanity so it might be able to respond to the growing planetary necessity for Human Unity and Cooperation. We are encouraged to undertake Steps to Knowledge. This site is a simple aid to introduce people to this practice. There is much more to learn for anyone who becomes a student. As a Steps student since June 27, 1999, I am a witness for its benefit. Tom Christoffel
Step 274 - I seek freedom from ambivalence today. (MP3) Entry for Step 273 - My Teachers hold the memory of my Ancient Home for me.
Greetings All –
Step 274 - I seek freedom
from ambivalence today. (MP3)[Open in Drive or copy to your Drive – Download
folder or play from Drive – Step PDF also.]
I seek freedom from ambivalence today. Step 274
SEEK FREEDOM FROM AMBIVALENCE, for this is the
source of all human confusion, misery and frustration. Ambivalence is the indecision
about participating with life. It is the indecision about being in life. It is
the indecision about being alive. From this indecision all manner of
self-imposition, all manner of attack and all manner of confrontation are
created. It is from this indecision that people live in fantasy without
BEWARE OF AMBIVALENCE THEN. It is a sign that you
are functioning without Knowledge and that you are trying to make your decisions
based purely upon speculation, personal preference and fear. It is decision
making without foundation that leads humanity astray. It is decision making
without foundation that has led you astray. Knowledge dispels ambivalence, for
it sets a clear direction. It is unconcerned with choices and with
deliberation, for it simply knows what is correct and leads you towards your
fulfillment, step by step, with certainty and abiding conviction.
REMEMBER UPON THE HOUR THAT YOU WISH TO ESCAPE from
ambivalence. Realize as you repeat your lesson how much of your life is wasted
in trying to decide between this and that, in asking yourself, “What should I
do now,” in querying yourself about what is right and what is wrong and in
wondering and worrying about the best choice and its possible consequences.
Knowledge liberates you from this taxing and wasteful application of your mind.
Knowledge does not deliberate. It simply waits for the time to act and then it
acts. It is absolutely certain in its direction. It is unshakable in its
conviction. If you follow this, which is God’s greatest gift to you who live in
the world of ambivalence and confusion, you will find that you will have purpose,
meaning and direction and that day after day they will be very available to
IN YOUR DEEPER MEDITATIONS attempt to give yourself
wholeheartedly to your practice. Do not be ambivalent about your practice. Do
not hold back out of fear or uncertainty, for you are participating in this preparation
because Knowledge has called you to do so, and every day you give yourself
because Knowledge calls you to do so. Thus, as we proceed through our
preparation together, your Knowledge is strengthened day by day, for it is the
basis of your participation here. What other reason could you possibly have for
becoming a student of Knowledge?
THEREFORE, IN YOUR DEEPER PRACTICES and in your
hourly remembrances, strengthen your conviction that you must escape from ambivalence.
Realize the deadly cost of ambivalence. See how it keeps people lost in their
ideas, denying their engagement with life. See the human cost around you. It is
tremendous. Realize that with certainty everyone will find their rightful
place. The world will proceed without the friction that it now must bear. In
this way, all things seek fulfillment together in inclusion in life. That is
The Way of Knowledge.
PRACTICE 274: Two 30-minute practice periods. Hourly
The notion of our “Ancient Home” was first
introduced in Step 1. Where is that? It seems to be the place we were before
going into The Separation. The last paragraph of Step 273expresses the challenge as “redemption of the
world.” I wrote the problem as: “separation from Knowledge-“
Since it was Saturday, I had much time to think and
write in the journal. I’ve edited it down, but feel free to skip through. This
is my journey. Sometimes it isn’t even interesting to me. It is simply an example
from one life.
a.m. Saturday, April 15, 2000 –
tax day. I do not understand the world, I do not understand myself or my
relationships, so I seek Knowledge – Holy Spirit – my relationship with the
creator. And I can sense my guides/teachers saying yes – that is it – it is a
relationship all have. Becoming aware of it – connected to the creator – net in
a conscious way is the practice. I envision multiple nets, a matrix for the
creator is not a single point. Creation and creator are the same? We are
within the a creation matrix.
what am I doing here? The creation seeks higher order manifestation which is
not damaging to life. Beautiful planets and civilizations.
said, "I think, therefore I am." That's mind and body. For spirit
it is I am – therefore I think and manifest. The essence is of the
creator – I am that I am. Mind and matter are in play – the creation is.
environments – physical, bio-logical & techno-logical, are the habitat for
humanity and other species.
manifests and perpetuates itself. There are spiritual families which play
supportive roles in creation for the manifest is unknown until it is in play.
in play is composed of wholes and fragments. Growth and change.
the whole – be a small part – promote integration. We are one/won.
so eloquent and without audience. The whole is fragmented into smaller wholes
which become independent – rebelling against their progenitor.
is viewed as whole – is always a fragment. (RUOW – too much fragmentation.)
reality of economic survival. If I'm so smart, how come I'm not rich?
voice If you were money rich you would not now be at
this perspective. You do not lack for physical amenities – and your environment
is extremely wealthy – as you often noted. W/o experience it is difficult to
perceive the reality that can teach.
physical environments contain risk to life. Trauma can and does happen.
Recovery occurs – souls are rescued.
time as a tool. It marks navigation through space. Your true mission is to deal
with fragmentation and to utilize integration. Local/regional is the lens
through which you approach the issue and you can see it everywhere.
Fragmentation is dis-integration. It is a tool of creation. Mr.
Kropotkin – "the urge to destroy is a creative urge."[Actually
Mikhail Bakunin] Lives integrate
and disintegrate. There are forces.
is your goal to fill the book to the last page and start over with a new book.
go on to think about what your future might be – what actions you must take.
Fear struck – for it still looks negative to your ego.
are free and have transition time. You experienced this sense, yet shame as
experienced by the ego. You have lost status – been denied your
accomplishments, and relieved of command – Lee Iacocca – it happened to him –
whacked as CEO of Ford – went on to Chrysler. You're a car guy – don't dwell on
the past. You needed to be free and are – but freedom is scary – in the full
risk universe – that is why you are not alone. No soul travels alone in truth.
Keeping the physical humans separated from their soul families is the method of
domination as opposed to methods of organization.
page left – what do you want? The recipe to the universe? The single rule for
investment success? The one click Amazon.com step to soul integration? The
feeling that has me now, other than the undercurrent of irritation with Cindy
for distracting me, is the gratitude for the AA groups here in Front Royal who
took Sarah in and helped her grow. The world is full of wounded who have
recovered and help each other in peer networks – families of pain – and gain.
eternal network of souls. The more Whole we become, the better we network. The
more we network – the more whole/local we become, the more whole/regional, we
become, the more we integrate and access the power: life. Choose life.
a.m. --- S2K – 273 – "My Teachers hold the memory of my Ancient Home for
me." This I need. When the time is right, the teacher will appear. I'd
always looked for a physical teacher. My unseen teachers have appeared
throughout my life. S2K is increasing my access to my teachers for the sake of
my growth in KNOWLEDGE. OK.
p.m. My world is getting in order – the big world is in turmoil. Stock market
down – I'm buying into the down trend. Lots of sad people. I've a 10 year
horizon minimum. I might have started too soon, but w/o Adam's evaluation I
wouldn't have known where to go.
afternoon I need to work on my plan.
p.m. Is it a business? I don't think so. It is a research proposition.
got the whole world in his hands.
money were no object – I do a regional registry 1st – a contact database –
including websites of all regional councils.
– a database sort routine that if you enter ZIP Code, locality name &
state, or County/State it would list your region.
design your region –
enter place of residence, place of work, place of other family work, weekend
recreation spots –
→ It maps that,
then relates that to existing regions –
→ a cascading map
that shows historical County formations – then overlays current regions –
government based regions –
→ neighbors &
peers database routine that takes any state data table – sorts by region and
geographic proximity – then can map.
[Community by regions.]
can be imposed from above. They are better/can be tools of empowerment if they
have agreement below – or are originated from below.
light is in the dark – I need more people/spirit teachers to find my way
p.m. At Little Bear. I brought the camera – it was in the car – and took
pictures. I wonder how many devas will be in the frames?
in is my traditional letting go of work issues. That was done before the 1st
vortex at the streambed split. I decided I had to stick around to see how they
(the commission) dealt with the new costs (overhead) they've created. ---
I got to the wall – there was nothing to ground from work – how freeing that
Shenandoah Valley – Regional Community 101.
p.m. 4/22/2000 Everything Networks – the true fabric of the creation
p.m. @ Su–ne – the woods here on the Dickey Ridge Trail feel like home. They
always have. This is a place I go to to restore my Soul. The Lords Chapel is
another place that feels like home. When I'm in a Holy Instant – It Feels like
Home – T–om – H–ome.
have a gift for the world if I can only articulate it, birth it. This requires
more Knowledge than I now have.
not been still very much in the woods here… But that may be OK – I took
pictures to send to Sarah.
If you made it all the way through that, thanks. After
mapping the manifest creation, I wrote:“I'm so eloquent and without audience.” Not
eloquent, but perhaps here for a tiny audience, those who may be interested in
how another person’s journey proceeded, bumps, warts and random insight.
Later I note: “Another voice”At some point in my journaling I was began to hold conversations with
other voices. This is a literary technique, but that was not the reason that I
used it. In a reading about 1989 I was told that I had four guides and that we
were working together as a team on a project. I was also told that I could
listen for these voices for inspiration. I’d done that over the years.
The introduction of the notion of Teachers in Steps
was not new, but the quality of one’s Teachers and Guides is important, as we
are told there are many voices that wish to communicate to us. It is for this
reason one should say:“I surround and
protect myself with the love and the grace of God” prior to meditating. The
invocation Nasi Novare Coram is presented in Step 296 and translated as:“The presence of the Teachers of God is with
So, let us continue.
Journal second time x2
Step 273.This is for those who have completed
Steps once. Doing Steps with only the texts, messages and your life experience,
including what you may have studied and practiced is your journey. I’m showing
Step comments after the Step, so as not to influence you in advance. It is a
wilderness trek to be left to your own wits, but then you can also listen more
closely for guides, angels and teachers, always first saying: “I surround and
protect myself with the Love and the Grace of God.” Thankfully, I was taught
this practice in 1989.
P.S. If you’ve some interest due to this or other
Steps, you should go to the beginning blog post. From here you will learn about Steps to Knowledge
and can begin it on the day that makes sense; then progress as needed. You can
use the posts on this blog as a companion if it helps. They will remain in
order in the archives - one post per Step.
Often it takes 18 months to get through the Steps
once. For this blog, the pace is one-a-day, but it really makes no difference
how fast you do it, only that you begin, persist and repeat. Posts here provide
a trail that may let you have a virtual companion when and if you want one. One
may have to study alone, as I did in the beginning. There are other Steps
students blogging their experience and you might find a person more like you as
a companion, or use a number of such Steps journeys. There are options as well
through the Free School of the New Message.