Greetings All –
Step 184 - My questions
are greater than I had realized before. (MP3) [Open in Drive or copy
to your Drive – Download folder or play from Drive – Step PDF also.]
 |
| “My questions are greater than I had realized.” Step 184 |
WHAT YOU ARE REALLY ASKING FOR is far greater than
what you have entertained before. Though your questions may have arisen out of
immediate circumstances, you are asking for far more than immediate resolution
to immediate things. Immediate resolution will be given, but from a Greater
Source. It is this Greater Source that you are seeking, for you are seeking to
realize your nature here, and you are seeking to find the preparation that will
enable you to contribute your gifts so that your work in the world may be complete.
Therefore, understand that you are here to serve. You are here to give. And in
so doing, you will find your fulfillment. This will produce happiness for you.
IN YOUR TWO LONGER PRACTICE PERIODS TODAY, once
again enter into stillness and silence, keeping in mind that stillness
cultivates the mind to receive. In stillness you find that things are known
already that you have neglected thus far. From these practice periods your mind
will become more refined and have greater depth, greater concentration and a
greater focus in all aspects of your life.
WHAT YOU ARE SEEKING TODAY is something greater
than you have considered before. You are seeking to know the meaning of your Knowledge
through its demonstration.
PRACTICE 184: Two 30-minute practice periods.
Yesterday: Step183 - I seek experience not answers.
From the Journal:
8:25
a.m. Sunday, Jan 16, 2000 – up – yet sleepy – a deep night. This world is where
I am. It is where my consciousness is focused in manifestation. It is not a
dream, it is not entirely an illusion, it is an aspect of the creation.
Maintaining contact – feedback with the Creator is important to make the
experience worthy of the energy utilized.
GCWK
is a method of increasing the level of connection so that one’s role in the
manifestation can be more effective. The Spiritual Efficiency Act (SEA) or
something like that.
GCWK
is technique for connection. It does not tell me what to do. It is affirming
the connection I already have built, stripping some of the metaphysics which
cloud the process.
I’m
anxious to get on to part two. In the pillars work I see where I’ve let myself
become depressed bout the work of life and let it slide. This occurs/has
occurred when relationships have gone south or were never adequately
established. It has also occurred when my expectations were too high and I’ve
been too focused on my work. ACIM and all my readings contribute, but only GCWK
gives a path w/o being overly prescriptive.
I am
responsible and I have help. I am not alone. I’ve felt alone and reached out to
God, to Christ and have gotten what I need. All life is risk management I’ve
intuited. I’ve lived very risky life as
PDC director. Very few can appreciate it – but this has been and will continue
to be an area where I seek to contribute.
Achieving
balance is the challenge now – jettisoning undoable ideas – parking them where
they are available, but not taking daily energy. Building staff capability –
that makes me cry … for I’ve made mistakes of a nature that I don’t understand.
Too much faith in people?
LTWOK
p. 38 – The promise “…you will be able to do what you know.”
…
12:47
p.m. At the trail – in my car. I’ll eat lunch, meditate, then hike. This book
shall be completed – then another will begin. I’m not quite awake – don’t know
why.
1:15
p.m. What do I need; what do I know? I need the PDC job more than the money because
it is a platform for learning and teaching. I must understand why it is working
here better than other areas, to understand – abstract knowledge for theory in
order to promote. I need money for my children and to support my travels. I’ll
need money to spread the word and to support GCWK.
1:22
p.m. I’m also lately in a zombie sense. Overdue for practice #1 today. I’ve all
the pieces – just need to get the entrainment I need to be the leader who is
facilitator.
How
can people know what needs to be done when they don’t have a greater view. It’s
that things don’t feel right.
[New
journal composition book]
2:32
p.m. Jan 16, 2000 – Where am I? I am sitting above Su-Ne. It is a windy cool
January day. I’ve done practice 183 – “I seek experience not answers.” This is
the area of my first HI [Holy Instant] – that is to me the connection with
Knowledge. I know work in the field of cooperation is important. It is an area
where I can continue to contribute. We humans must better manage our
settlements. There’s been waste on a large scale. Still there is a great
resilience. More souls are coming – we must make sure they will have lunch. We
need to utilize better the value that has been created. S2K often seems harsh –
a Puritan ethic of sorts. The detail of my life – OK – move to work.
I
lay curled up on the rock. The wind blows. I am still. People pass on the path.
I hear voices – see them through the grey winter trunks of trees on the path
across the stream. The sun sparkles – edging lower in the sky. Clouds pushed by
the wind speed across the blue, blue sky. Airplanes overhead – Dulles airport
is near – and car and truck motors from the highways.
I am
content here in the winter woods. I’d be OK as a tree, a rock, a leaf. This is
pure nature. Lean and bare for winter. I could sleep here forever if that were
my life form’s process. I could be that. I read once of a lone alien who had
been separated from his family after a crash. For several hundred years he
lived on a rock among the moss before venturing on to another venue.
I
have office work – PDC work to do. That is important. In the funky years I lost
momentum. I need to consolidate around the do-able. I know that to be water,
transportation, dates, GIS and mapping and facilitation of discussion about our
continued settlement of this earth.
3:06
p.m. And another experience of being present with knowledge ends so that I
might continue about the Creator’s work. Open eyed pure being with no agenda,
no need, no fear, no action, - all sense -
pure and still. The woods from where I looked because a still life so I
understand what a “still life” portrait is – stopping the world – showing
Knowledge. Continuous stillness is not the goal – for I am here to work – but
the connection affirms – and is an unbelievable joy.
Amen & Amen
T-om at Su-Ne
3:40
p.m. At the office – I need to integrate the experience I am having with
Knowledge so I can bring it more into the world. As I walked out of the woods I
felt a great responsibility. In my daily work I am faced with a tremendous
backlog of work.
I
need a flushing out and simplifying – somehow. I have a foundation. I must
continue to make progress.
…
4:42
p.m. Vision is so easy – work is so
hard. Is that my lesson? People want to do their part to the exclusion of
others – and be off to be free. I don’t have that luxury.
…
Another day of long journal entries. I include most
of it as an example of how I am changing as a consequence of applying the
lessons of Steps and Knowledge in my life. Henry David Thoreau was and is one
of my favorite writers. When I read him in my college sophomore American
Literature classes, I recognized someone who thought like me. He was a
transcendentalist and I felt I was as well. I fell into that sense in the woods
that day and very often do that to this day.
Also note I’m already thinking about financial
support for GCWOK. Your pace may be different, but that is likely to be true of
any student who undertakes the Steps to Knowledge.
NNC
Journal second time x2 Step 183. This
is for those who have completed Steps once. Doing Steps with only the texts,
messages and your life experience, including what you may have studied and
practiced is your journey. I’m showing Step comments after the Step, so as not
to influence you in advance. It is a wilderness trek to be left to your own
wits, but then you can also listen more closely for guides, angels and
teachers, always first saying: “I surround and protect myself with the Love and
the Grace of God.” Thankfully, I was taught this practice in 1989.
P.S. If you’ve some interest due to this or other
Steps, you should go to the beginning blog post. From here you will learn about Steps to Knowledge
and can begin it on the day that makes sense; then progress as needed. You can
use the posts on this blog as a companion if it helps. They will remain in
order in the archives - one post per Step.
Often it takes 18 months to get through the Steps
once. For this blog, the pace is one-a-day, but it really makes no difference
how fast you do it, only that you begin, persist and repeat. Posts here provide
a trail that may let you have a virtual companion when and if you want one. One
may have to study alone, as I did in the beginning. There are other Steps
students blogging their experience and you might find a person more like you as
a companion, or use a number of such Steps journeys. There are options as well
through the Free School of the New Message.
