Greetings All –
Step 229 - I will not blame another for my pain. Entry for Step 228 - I will not be poor today.
Greetings All –
TODAY’S IDEA REPRESENTS A TREMENDOUS SHIFT in understanding. It must be born of Knowledge to have true effectiveness, however, its meaning is not immediately apparent, for you will soon find that there are many circumstances in which others seem completely responsible for your pain. It will be very difficult, given your habitual thinking and the assumptions upon which you live, to deny that others are indeed the cause of your pain. This, however, is not how Knowledge views you, and you must learn not to view yourself in this way.
PAIN IS ALWAYS A DECISION THAT YOU MAKE in response to any stimuli in your environment. The body will have physical pain if it is so stimulated, but that is merely a sensory response. It is not the true pain that hurts you. The pain that hurts you is the crown of thorns of your own ideas and assumptions, your own misgivings and misinformation and your own unforgiveness towards yourself and the world. This produces a pain both within your mind and upon your body as well. It is this pain we wish to alleviate this day.
THEREFORE, CONSIDER TODAY’S IDEA AS A FORM OF REMEDY against pain. If another is the cause of your pain, you have no remedy except to attack or to change the other person. Even your attempt to change them for good will be a form of attack, for underneath your altruism will be hatred and resentment. Therefore, there is no remedy for pain if its cause is beyond you. But there is remedy for all pain because Knowledge is with you.
THEREFORE, ALL PAIN MUST BE RECOGNIZED as the result of your own decision. It must be recognized as the result of your own interpretation. You may feel that you have been wronged by another or by the world. This feeling is actually present in your mind, so it need not be denied, but you must look beyond it to its source and to the mechanism for its emergence. To do this, then, you must utilize your own faculties. This will give you great strength. You will be able to do this because Knowledge is with you and because with Knowledge you can do all things that Knowledge asks you to do.
WITHOUT CONDEMNATION, THE WORLD IS SO RELIEVED that it can begin to recover itself. Therefore, upon the hour repeat this idea and consider its meaning. Go deeply within it to discover what it truly holds for you. In your longer practice periods, enter stillness and peace, for without condemnation upon the world and upon yourself, the mind is at peace already.
PRACTICE 229: Two 30-minute practice periods. Hourly practice.
Yesterday: Step 228 - I will not be poor today.
The topic is wealth, always a concern to people. A divisive concern in my household growing up was the notion that a good Lutheran family should tithe. The church elders would visit the house to encourage giving. Arguments ensued once they left. My father didn’t have a great income and, in fact, about 1956, my mother discovered that we were $10,000 in debt. He had to take a second job and, with frugal living, we eventually were able to buy a house, much later than our peers. The experience made me debt-averse in life, which has probably been to my benefit.
The Step says: “Knowledge is great wealth.”
This led me to write: “Why tithe? – give it all!” This was not a new idea, but one that came to the fore at this Step. One’s whole life can be given to God, so whatever activity, even relaxation, can be seen as contributing to what is being done. The great benefit of Steps is the way in which one can find, more accurately perhaps, that which one is intended to be doing in life. The Sacred Life message confirms as much, letting it be known that one need not be in a monastery or convent, a religious community, to lead a sacred life.
From the Journal:
Tuesday, February 29, 2000
7 a.m. Meditate. How has the world been rearranged as I slept? Did my family participate? Did I?
7:50 a.m. 228 – "I will not be poor today." “… begin to look more deeply at those things that are obstructions to you.” – What is an obstruction? Lack of time; taking on too much; too many relationships that drain –; unmanaged relationship; self-distraction; people not doing their job; my failure to move on people who didn't do their jobs; by unrealistic vision of integration; food obsessions; harshness – in my person; go with the flow spiritual ignorance and relationships, thus not taking responsibility for my power.
5:22 p.m. – Quite a day. I was able to easily refashion the Trip grant into the new products they wanted at VDRPT. ---… Still slow. I have not been poor today. Sarah is at risk.
Progress? It seems so, but there is still quite a number of Steps to go, just to get through it once in order to begin to build a foundation. Let us continue.
P.S. At Step 229, we are into Part Two of Steps, so if you’ve found this and find some appeal in this or other Steps, you should really go to the beginning blog post. From here you learn about Steps to Knowledge and can begin it on the day that makes sense and then progress as needed. You can use the posts on this blog as a companion if it helps. They will remain in order in the archives - one per Step.
Often it takes 18 months to get through the Steps once. For this blog, the pace is one-a-day, but it really makes no difference how fast you do it, only that you begin, persist and repeat. Posts here provide a trail that may let you have a virtual companion when and if you want one. One may have to study alone, as I did in the beginning. There are other Steps students blogging their experience and you might find a person more like you as a companion, or use a number of such Steps journeys. There are options as well through the Free School of the New Message.