Step 316 - I will trust my deepest inclinations today. Entry for Step 315 - Today I will not be alone.

Greetings All –

Step 316 - I will trust my deepest inclinations today.

YOUR DEEPEST INCLINATIONS EMANATE FROM KNOWLEDGE. As your mind becomes clear of its restraints and as your life begins to open to the greater calling that is emerging for you now, these deeper inclinations will become more powerful and more evident. You will be able to discern them more easily. This will require great self-trust, which of course will require great self-love. To trust your deepest inclinations, to follow Knowledge and to be a student of Knowledge will re-establish your self-love and will place it upon a firm foundation that the world cannot shake.

HERE YOU ARE REDEEMED IN YOUR OWN EYES. Here you are brought into relationship with life. Here your self-love engenders love for others, for there is no inequality here. You are reclaimed, and in your reclamation Knowledge begins to express itself within the world. You are its primary beneficiary, but even greater than this is its impact upon the world. For in your giving, you will remind the world that it is not bereft of hope, that it is not alone, that you are not alone, that others are not alone and that all the deepest inclinations for hope, truth and justice that others feel are not without foundation, but are born of Knowledge within themselves. Thus, you will be a force for confirmation within the world and a force to confirm Knowledge in others as well.

REMEMBER YOUR IDEA UPON THE HOUR and attempt to utilize all situations that you encounter today for the purpose of reclaiming Knowledge. In this way, you will see that your entire life can be used for practice. As this is done, everything that happens will serve you, and you will feel love towards the world. Your deeper inclinations will spark and encourage the deeper inclinations in others, and thus you will be a force for Knowledge in the world.

IN YOUR TWO DEEPER MEDITATION PRACTICES, in stillness take refuge in the temple of Knowledge within you. Attempt here to be still and simply feel the power of Knowledge in your life. Bring not your questions, for they will be answered by Knowledge as it emerges within you. Come in openness, seeking relief, seeking comfort, seeking power and seeking certainty. These you will experience because these emanate from the essence of Knowledge within you. Let this day be a day of self-trust and therefore a day of self-love.

PRACTICE 316: Two 30-minute practice periods. Hourly practice.

Yesterday:  Step 315 - Today I will not be alone.

This Step tells us:“Do not think you are alone, for this is a fantasy. Today do not be alone.”  

Being alone had been a lifelong problem for me. The Robert A. Heinlein science fiction novel, “Stranger in a Strange Land,” was a thought/reference that summed up the situation. Steps challenges such thinking and this Step makes one think.

The journal was full this day:

7:30 a.m. – Saturday, May 27, 2000 On waking – Realizing/feeling my own ambivalence toward life. People do not act as though they are ambivalent or confused. They’ve decided what to do – or have learned something and follow that. They may be confused, but don't know it.

Confusion is what makes me ambivalent. It comes from witnessing that which I cannot understand. Things do not make sense. They do not operate in a clear way. Where I find myself is not where I want to be. If I retrace the past steps – I get to here – some moments I'm in a good place – but others not. So, often I want to use the time machine to go back, do a different thing, follow a prior hunch – make an assertive step. Yesterday at lunch in Harrisonburg – a bunch of HS Seniors it seemed – the table started with 8 and more than doubled. The kids self-confident in their interactions, friendly – like Seniors are. How many would be students of life, Students of Knowledge?

Where is the world going – can I be of any help? Most are just concerned about doing their lives. Spirituality – may not be an obvious component.

So – I remain ambivalent about/within my life, in spite of my spiritual experiences.

I can see/have seen deeply committed religious people. They follow their teachings – but can layer on religious laws that are harmful and repressive. My soul has had such experiences.

There are heavens for each? Spiritual families – As below, so above. Yet S2K says humanity is all the same and needs to become a single community of mind in order not to become dominated.       

Spiritual practitioners – all see that we are one (won). "There is but WON GOD." "KNOW TO SAY YES TO THE WON [Creator] GOD."

I've spent a lot of my life not being satisfied with myself. Much of that has to do with the people I end up dealing with. Life's experience would be better if I were in better experiences with people? How do I find those people?

ENTJ - an imperfect personality among others.

Ambivalent – can I choose life and reject the world? (1:31 PM 5/28/00 – yes –)

In S2K – the challenge is greater than just personal salvation. It is a call to maintain the integrity of the earth for the birthing, nurturing of souls.

Is there "soul sanity" like "human sanity" – assuming the latter even occurs?

The human chemistry of moods is now being managed. Are we all chemies – is that where ambivalence comes from – a drug imbalance?

A divergence here in the thinking, but my greatest challenge is now and has always been my confusion and ambivalence.

There are many physical paths to follow for material wealth. Having enough of that to live and raise a family is a pillar of life. The greater path the world needs is to experience humanity as one community. The foundation is set and emerging.

There are minds that recognize the need for cultural diversity and unity.

Something in the physical will happen. S2K says 10% of population can keep the mental side stable. We need 600 million –? 6,000,000,000 X .1 = 600,000,000

– Maintaining stillness for the planet – a chain of stillness

– The world is the world – it is supported in the void by stillness –

Be Still and Know

Yet another idea for my ambivalent life.

– Step 315 "Today I will not be alone." – "any sense of inadequacy and unworthiness… Are merely the residue of your separate, imagined life."

2:20 p.m. Yet to begin Practice #1. Ate lunch, watched Book TV on C-SPAN 2 – A poet reading from Dante – Virgil in a line – "We are here for knowledge and to lead lives of virtue." Sounds like a line from S2K. Why do I have the life I have? It is a mystery.

Saturday – intended to be my Sabbath – then I was watching a show about serial murderers.

– Jeffrey Dahmer – why does that happen to people?

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– Mom called – Dad's balance problems were because he wasn't exercising – sounds like my message too.

6:30 p.m. I actually sat at the keyboard and made progress on View 2100 – thanks for the spiritual support family of Sha-rone – I need it – to regain the sense that I can do something. I've done my exploration – and there shall be more – but I've got to write about the vision – or no one will benefit. I'm revitalized along with my father.

What is complex must be simplified in order to have action.

More people mean more relationships, more iteration, but the relationships are basic – with greater community we can each do more. To specialize without separating is the challenge.

Standards are needed for operations. Enforcers – monitors are needed for compliance. W/O uniformity/Style – you lose impact.

7:08 p.m. 2nd practice in David's room – looking out on my maple tree – hearing the 900 MHz remote speaker play Harmonic Resonance. I am not alone today… Only 600,000,000 souls for 10% Knowledge/Spirit. A huge market needed – soul brothers/sisters for our local planet.

Stillness – is always there – the underlying non–beat.

11:58 p.m. Dinner @ Hotel Strasburg tonight – Cindy, Penny and I. I didn't speak much. I was stillness of the party. Being still – with nothing to ponder – or look at – what do you do? I ate enough calories to support a small village – no guilt – what was there better use of time? Don't know.

Upon getting home – wasted some time on the web.

Long day, if we measure by word count. In 2000, the 10% was 600 million for six billion people. Now that is 700 million, since we’ve gone over 7 billion. One can begin reading and choose to study the New Message, but being a student who does the tests takes years. Let us continue.

NNC

P.S. At Step 316, we are less than two months from the end – Step 365. If you’ve found this and find some appeal in this or other Steps, you should really go to the beginning blog post. From here you learn about Steps to Knowledge and can begin it on the day that makes sense and then progress as needed. You can use the posts on this blog as a companion if it helps. They will remain in order in the archives - one per Step.

Often it takes 18 months to get through the Steps once. For this blog, the pace is one-a-day, but it really makes no difference how fast you do it, only that you begin, persist and repeat. Posts here provide a trail that may let you have a virtual companion when and if you want one. One may have to study alone, as I did in the beginning. There are other Steps students blogging their experience and you might find a person more like you as a companion, or use a number of such Steps journeys. There are options as well through the Free School of the New Message.